This week I am observing all the relationships that need to be mended after arguments.
We can see this with the past political climate when family members, friends, neighbors, and even social media followers had a couple of months of volatile conversations.
I also have worked with people this past week that had ended relationships with family members or friends over a heated argument in an impulsive manner and then felt remorse.
This happens a lot in marriages when people disconnect after arguments and have no idea to repair and reconnect.
How do we mend, repair and reconnect a wounded relationship?
1. Observe whether you are only interested in reconnecting to prove to the other person that you are right. Obviously, that won’t work and will only continue to escalate the conflict.
2. Clear your intentions – What do you want to create at the end of the relationship? What type of quality do you want to have in your relationships?
3. Reflect back to past arguments and behaviors and assess what part you played in the conflict and the breakdown of the communication.
4. Identify which one of your behaviors might have hurt them.
5. Would you be willing to take responsibility for how you have hurt them or have created a disconnect in the relationship?
6. Would you be willing to apologize for your part in the disconnection?
7. Would you consider having a quality relationship worth more than being righteous about your ideas?
8. Would you be interested in seeing the other person’s world and have compassion and understanding for their views?
9. Reach out with the context of reconnection and forgive them for their behavior that has hurt you.
10. Listen, Listen, Listen, first – Share yourself – with love.
We can disagree and have different opinions, and yet connect with each other with love and understanding. People who report they are in healthy marriages or friendships live this concept every day. We can connect with our similarities and likes, and accept our differences.
To learn more skills of observation and intention creation go to my book “Life Reset – The Awareness Integration Path to Create the Path You Want”.
Mend your own heart from disconnecting from people just because they are not like you. Open your heart to all. You will enjoy the feeling of love that arises.