Hang in there – Hardship builds resiliency

man about to climb using brown rope

Photo by Alex Hussein on Pexels.com

This week I have been working with how experiencing hardship, although it feels and seems so hard as one goes through it, ultimately builds major emotional and behavioral skills which become a key factor for not only survival but also creating a better and more efficient life.

I was pondering on my own childhood and teen years and have been working this week with many of my clients who have gone through hardships, whether it was events that happened to them while they had no part in creating it, an illness, or they actually acted in a way that produced a painful result for them.  Without a doubt at the time of experiencing hardship, one might think: “Why me”, “Not Fair”, “it should have not happened to me”, ” I didn’t do anything to deserve this”, “can’t handle this, it is too much for me”, etc… Feelings of fear, sadness, grief, anger, anxiety, disappointment, powerlessness, helplessness, hopelessness, shame, etc. might be felt.  Major avoiding or dismissive behaviors might be used automatically as self-defense mechanisms.  However, courage and resiliency begin to operate and surface to support moving forward and overcome the meaning and the emotion felt.
Usually, as time passes, you begin to assign new meaning and contain the emotions toward the acceptance of all that happened.  You will see that what happened although it effected your life in a negative way, it also enriched your life with major skills and extended the outlook that could benefit yours and other’s life.
Go back and look at the negative and even traumatizing events of your life and write down how they benefited you.  Write how they added to your life view.  See how the skills that you had to learn at that time is being used consistantly for the betterment of your life.  You will be amazed at your growth.  While you are visualizing the past, remind the self which was going through the harsh ordeal that you have survived it.  Nurture yourself, pat yourself on the back, acknowledge yourself for coming through, and honor your growth.
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About Dr.FoojanZeine

Dr. Foojan Zeine is an International Speaker, Psychotherapist, Life Coach, and the Author of Life Reset – The Awareness Path to Create the life You Want. She has a Doctorate in Clinical Psychology, and is a licensed Marriage and Family Therapist. She practices in Beverly Hills, Irvine & Woodland Hills, California offices and online via audio/chat or video. Her expertise is in Intimate Relations and Addictive Behaviors. She has extensive experience treating Depression, Anxiety, Traumas, and Domestic Violence. Foojan is the originator and the author for “Awareness Integration” psychotherapeutic model, which is a multi-modality approach and intervention toward minimizing Depression, Anxiety while improving Self Esteem and Self Confidence. This Method has been published with multiple research. Foojan hosts the “Inner Voice” show in the KMET1490AM/ ABC Radio. She is a guest speaker in many universities including Harvard, MIT, UCLA, USC. She has been a guest in the Dr. Phil show in CBS, Fox, Voice of America Television Programs; KPFK 90.7, KIRN 670AM. www.Foojan.com
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